I have a friend who was close with her in-laws before she even met her husband. He had been living away from home, but upon returning found himself doing volunteer service under the direction of her father. I am sure being friends with your future in-laws before ever knowing your future-spouse is not a common occurrence. And as ideal as this scenario would be to avoid that awkward first get together, I can tell you that my friend’s father still told her husband “no” when he asked for her hand. Twice. So what can be done to put your best foot forward with our future in-laws?
In my experience, finding common ground on interests, opinions or beliefs is a great place to start. We find this information with a little recon through our fiancé and through “dating” our in-laws by way of quality time and genuine interest in their lives.
Another effective route is through understanding their personality and being flexible or accommodating to those intricacies. Putting a defensive introvert on the spot in a group setting would be ill-advised, as would planning movable events during the championship game of a life-long sports enthusiast. We must show love or care for our in-laws as we strive to do with our fiancé – in a way that makes them feel valued.
And sometimes, life is just too crazy or your cup is just a bit dry. The good news: genuine compliments and a bottle of your in-law’s favorite wine will usually not go amiss.